Jena Warrior Princess
by BadgebunnyUK
Summary: Just a bit of fun. re-working of the season 1 ep "I kissed a girl" Warrior Princess style. With Mauriel the healer of Potedia. Just slipped some of my fave rizzle scenes in from the show where I think they most channel Xena and Gabby. I may do more if people like it.


"Jena, What is it?" Mauriel asked as Jena jumped down from her horse.

"Stay back Mauriel, let me see to it." Jena edged towards what looked like a large bundle of rags in the clearing. As Mauriel got closer, ignoring Jena's instruction, she realised what Jena already knew, that it was a body.

Mauriel gasped. "It's a woman."

The warrior princess had now drawn her sword and turned her back on the body checking the surrounding area for any malingering threat.

Mauriel had crouched to kneel by the woman's body. "She has been dead for some time. It also looks like she has been interfered with."

Jena glanced at the body and saw Mauriel pull the woman's garments down over her body to cover her respectfully. "Sick son of a Bacchae!" Jena muttered sheathing her sword, happy that there was no imminent danger.

"Usually in cases like these the killer is someone known to the victim, a family member or husband." Mauriel stated. Jena would like to know one day where Mauriel got all this information from but was afraid that if she asked, Mauriel would actually tell her.

"On second thought" Mauriel had pulled a piece of parchment from the body of the woman and unfurled it. "Maybe not a husband."

Mauriel turned to show Jena the contents of the scroll, an erotic drawing of two scantily clad warrior women, their bodies entwined.

"Amazons" Jena grimaced.

* * *

"So, let me get this right, I am going to infiltrate the Amazons, masquerade as one of them and use my obvious charms to find out which one of them was the dead girls BFF and probably killed her." Jena summarised, hands on hips, she was wearing that face she wore when she was humouring Mauriel.

"That's right." Mauriel nodded reasonably.

"And you are coming along because...?" Jena waved her left hand around in the air searching for a reason she could not find.

"Because, I've got your back." Mauriel said a gleam in her eye and flashing a dazzling smile.

"This could be dangerous." Jena warned.

"I am well aware of that Jena. Amazons are trained as warriors from a very early age, they are experts with the bow and arrow, hand to hand combat and often use the librys; a kind of double edged axe as a weapon.

"Gee, thanks for that nugget of information, I have come up against these ladies once or twice before Mauriel" Jena said getting agitated.

"Seriously Jena, you may need a healer, this is a dangerous mission, and besides I've never been an Amazon before." This last was said with a suggestive look and a change in Mauriel's voice that Jena supposed was meant to be sultry. Mauriel turned to her knapsack and pulled out what looked like an old outfit she had cut up for bandages.

"What's that?" Jena asked, already afraid of the answer.

"My outfit!" Mauriel pronounced seemingly very proud of her handiwork.

"So you weren't born here?" Jena asked feigning a very slight amount of interest as she sat with another Amazonian suspect over a mug of ale in the refreshments tent.

"Oh no, I remember telling my parents; I'm off to join the Amazons! the looks on their faces y'know?" The petite woman gave Jena a conspirators grin.

Jena nodded. "I know what you mean." She turned and caught sight of Mauriel, giving her the signal.

Mauriel who had been eagerly watching the pair jumped off her seat and strode over. Mauriel put her arm around Jena's shoulders and leant forward, slightly dipping her head and saying "Hey babe." loud enough for both women to hear.

Jena turned her head a little, immediately thanking the gods that Mauriel's breast were not sporting any sharpened edges as she would certainly have lost an eye.

"Hey there, B- babe." Jena said trying to hide her frown then turning to the woman opposite her. "This is Mauriel, my lifelong best friend forever." Jena said slowly and with meaning whilst putting both her arms snugly around Mauriel's waist and pulling her in close.

"Get it?" Mauriel said looking across the table and arching a dangerous brow.

Jena tossed in a wink for extra affect and the woman excused herself and left hastily.

Jena released her grip on Mauriel and took another long drink of ale. "Not her, she is a newcomer and my gut says she hasn't got it in her to swat a fly." Jena shook her head. "We could be here all night."

"You should resist make assumptions about people based solely on their appearance or on first impressions alone Jena, your gut may prove to be very unreliable and unfair." Mauriel said as she turned and flounced back to her table at the other side of the bar.

"Whatever." Jena mumbled at her retreating form.

* * *

The women didn't have to wait long for the next Amazon to approach Jena and this one looked as different to the last as night to day.

Mauriel instantly felt a little anxious and ironically had to tell her own gut to calm down as the tall blonde woman moved dangerously close to pass Jena and sit at the table, not waiting for any invitation.

"Evening" Jena nodded calmly.

"I heard you were the one brought in the dead girl." The woman got right to it.

"Yeah that was me." Jena confirmed making herself a little taller on her stool. "You know anything about that?"

"Maybe" The woman called over to a waitress with a flick of her hand and earned herself a mug of ale. "Maybe I knew her real well." The blonde leaned toward Jena as she continued. "But maybe it turns out I wasn't the only one and you would be smart to leave well enough alone supposing you don't want the same thing happening to you or yours." The woman took a long drink and watched Jena over the rim of her mug.

"Is that so?" Jena said sweetly.

"It is, so maybe you wanna take that sweet little piece of ass you got over there and get back to your own tribe." The woman nodded over at Mauriel who sat watching the interaction curiously.

At the mention of her friend, Jena narrowed her eyes and then making a move to get up from the table suddenly tipped the large piece of cedar wood furniture on its side, unseating the woman facing her and sending their mugs of ale crashing over. Jena let out a yell as she jumped up on her right leg, kicking the left one forcefully into the woman's stomach and sending her flying backward to land on the sawdust floor.

Mauriel rolled her eyes at the display and slipped down off her stool as she watched Jena take out her sword and point it down over the floored woman's chest.

"I don't take kindly to threats and seeing that you just about admitted to me that you killed that poor girl, I am turning your sorry ass over to the Queen. Now get up!" Jena slowly pulled her sword back giving the woman just enough room to scrabble up from the floor; Jena's eyes fixed on her every move.

Jena knew the second the woman made up her mind and decided to shift her body ready to rush at Jena and so she was anticipating the movement. Jena swept her leg out in a circular motion taking the Amazons feet from beneath her and sending her sailing back through the air to the floor.

Mauriel moved to Jena's side, hands on her hips and sticking out her ample chest in a style she always thought looked confident and threatening on Jena.

"Looks like she wants to do this the hard way." Mauriel said loudly to Jena.

Jena smiled darkly.

* * *

"So tell me why we agreed to bathe up to our necks in mud?" Jena asked, her head the only part of her she could move freely, turned to look at Mauriel who was similarly encased only a few feet away.

"This is a thank you from the Amazon Queen. It is a cleansing and relaxation ritual that they practice in this tribe. You should really try and be more open to embracing other cultures Jena."

"It's mud" Jena pointed out. "And _it_ is embracing _me_, all over, _everywhere_."

"It's clay." Mauriel corrected.

"Oh well in that case..."

"Let's just be quiet." Mauriel said laying her head back and closing her eyes with a deep breath.

"Did you just tell me to be quiet?" Jena asked affronted.

Mauriel opened one eye to peek over at Jena and gage just how mad she actually was before deciding on a different approach. "Anyway Jena, the next part of this ritual is the hot tub, I promise to clean you up in there."

Jena was finally hushed and looked much happier as she let her head fall back.

* * *

Sometime later and feeling much cleaner the travellers had left the Amazons and were back on their way. They had been distracted from their planned visit to see Jena's mother Angeleste at the inn she ran in Jena's home town. Mauriel had been looking forward to going back to see Angeleste who was almost like a mother to her nowadays and who always made her very welcome at The Dirty Warlord.

The two set up camp and as Jena tended to the horses, Mauriel spread their furs and sleeping mats out on the ground, side by side.

Jena finished up with the horses and came to join Mauriel on their temporary bed, She lay down under the sea of stars and sighed, happy to be back on the open road just the two of them and not confined to a community like the Amazons.

"I wonder what kind of women we would be with if we were Amazons?" Mauriel said out of the blue as she laid back, hands behind her head, gazing at the sky.

"What?" Jena exclaimed before following up with "Well, first of all; I would be the guy."

"That's a cliché" Mauriel told her "Why would you be the guy?"

"Because" Jena thought that was a completely adequate explanation.

"Because you're so bossy?" Mauriel challenged playfully.

"So are you." Jena countered feeling just as playful.

"No I am not." Mauriel declared.

"Yes you are, you're just soft and polite when you're bossing people around." Jena said chuckling to herself.

"Well it's a good thing you're not my type." Mauriel assured Jena

"What do you mean? I'm not you're type, that is so rude!" Jena pretended to be insulted. "I have many skills!" She added slyly, moving onto her side to examine the woman lay beside her.

"Well, you don't know how to relax and you wear your boots and clothes to bed and you just admitted you're bossy." Mauriel explained.

"Okay, yeah, _I'm_ bossy, you just got me to put myself up as bait for an Amazonian woman killer and then forced me to sit in mud for almost an hour to please some Queen and now you have demanded we go visit my Ma so you can indulge in a few home comforts and _I _am bossy?" Jena said incredulously.

"What are you doing?" She asked Mauriel who had just decided to ignore Jena's rant.

"I'm meditating; it's too stressful to argue with you." Mauriel closed her eyes and a moment later had drifted into a comfortable sleep.

**A/N - let me know if it worked and if you liked it and I may do some more. Thanks x**


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